The pouty child within

I almost just gave up on this entire thing yesterday. But I didn’t. Today is day 20 and I’ve almost made it through the holiday.

At home it was relatively easy to not open the wine. But here, with friends that are drinking, it’s harder. Lunch at a cute little restaurant… I was the only one not joining in the wine. And I wanted to just say “fuck it!” and join them. Then dinner at a vineyard. A gorgeous meal in an even more gorgeous setting. With a bottle of one of my all time favourite wine varieties on the table.

I think both meals were doubly hard as most of the menu at both places was heavy on shellfish and meat. I’m mostly vegetarian… and fatally allergic to shellfish. So my choices were incredibly limited in all areas.

I was able to get an iced tea at lunch and an AF strawberry mojito with dinner. Which was fresh and delicious, actually. Helped to take away the feeling of being left out. How crazy is it to feel I’m being left out because I’m having water instead of wine? I felt like a little petulant child who was mad at the world because I couldn’t have what I wanted.

I know I could have. I absolutely could have just said “fuck it” and poured a glass of wine. And if I hadn’t told my friends in advance that this break is important to me, I would have.

But I didn’t. And that’s what matters. Today is a new day and it will be easier today…. and tomorrow even more so.

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